themongooseandthesnake: “yeah im a lesbian trapped inside a man’s body” the cishet male laughs as he highfives one of his dudebros. suddenly he gives off a look of pure terror and a piercing shriek as his skin is ripped apart, much to the horror of his crew. his skin falls to the floor and a woman is left standing where he once was. “FINALLY” she roars, kicking one of the dudebros in the dick...
akatriel-rowanborn: walkwthoutrhythm: elfgrove: spookystriderass: sydferrett: why are some people so excited to be nineties kids i mean this was in style why wouldnt you be excited about that WE. USED. ALL. THE. COLORS. When you have slain a rainbow it is only right to use every part of it. See the Rainbow, Taste the Rainbow. Skin it for its pelt.
It’s taboo to admit that you’re lonely. You can make jokes about it, of course....– You’re Not Making The Most Of Your 20s by Ryan O’Connell (via 78mph)
punkrockmermaid: “I raped that test in math cla–” No. “I raped that game earli–” Stop. “The other team totally raped us tod–” Shut the fuck up. Do you see what you’re doing? YOU ARE MAKING RAPE SOUND LIKE A POSITIVE ACTION. YOU ARE EQUATING SEXUAL VIOLENCE WITH ACHIEVEMENTS. STOP.
stfusexists: faineemae: queenofadodi: Men had no problem violating women’s bodies while they had on corsets, petticoats and farthingales, so what the fuck makes you think a short skirt has anything to do with it? Men also have no problem violating women’s bodies while they wear a niqab, hijab and burqa, some of the most covered form of clothing. So basically, what the fuck makes you think...
oohtheyhavenibbles: bonesbuckleup: So today I learned that Eucalyptus leaves have this chemical in them and when koalas eat the leaves the chemical makes them drunk but since koalas only eat Eucalyptus leaves they basically go through their entire lives perpetually smashed.
Everyone at my school's idea of a relationship: Someone asks someone "Will you go out with me?" and the other person says yes. They hug in the hallways, hold hands in the morning before the bell rings, and they kiss at lunch. They say "I love you" after two days. The whole school agrees that they are the cutest couple ever and hopes that they will last.
My idea of a relationship: You start talking to each other and is in the "talking stage". One person asks you to go a date with them. You guys go a few more dates. You guys are dating. You guys act like a couple. You hug, you hold hands, you kiss. One person asks you to be their boyfriend/girlfriend. You guys are now officially a couple. You're in one of those relationships where you don't announce it to the whole world but you won't deny it if someone asked. You guys are comfortable around each other, you hang out outside of school. You say "I love you" when the time is right and when you actually mean it. You have a threeway with Satan. You agree that all other mortals are no better than the mud caked to your collective shoes and sacrifice the whole of your school to the Dark Lord as per his request mid-coitus. You rule the charred and ruined remains of your homeland with an iron fist. Together
mayb8e: i want you to read some books. read more than what you see on tumblr because it’s poisoning your mind and making you think you know more than you do
marielikestodraw: pahnem: mercuriesrising: aparticularlygoodfinder: Go to Starbucks. Order coffee for “Prisoner 24601” When they call out your order, jump up and yell “My name is Jean Valjean!” And if the barista replies with “AND I’M JAVERT,” you tip that motherfucker so hard you tip them right over the edge of a bridge you fucking didn’t oh my god.